From the Desk Of Lily A Thompson...

Hello Mommy,

Won't you step into my office and make yourself comfortable?

I asked you here to discuss some changes that have been going on around the house, many of which I'm sure you've noticed by now. I understand that this transition might be difficult for you, but I assure you it's important for the furtherment of our mutual goals. The issues at hand involve more than just your participation, but will result in a total overhaul of your life as you know it today. While that may sound scary, I will be happy to assist you during this tumultous time.

For starters, I have decided to start walking full-time. I may crawl if I have to get somewhere *reallyfast*, but I feel like walking erect is so much more fulfilling. I hear you gasp each time I take a tumble or start to lose my footing, but I assure you I'm on my way to becoming a professional.

Also, I've decided to take up climbing as a hobby. I feel like being upwardly mobile is important for my mental development and I also really enjoy watching your eyes bulge out of your head when I stand on my new rocking chair and oscillate wildly.

For your further enjoyment, I am also copying any and all noises you make. Please note that whenever you say "No! No!" that I will be happy to yell back "Nah! Nah!" so that you understand that I am equally outraged by my actions, but adamantly refuse to accept your verbal condemnation. I'm smaller and I'm faster, so I have a clear advantage anyway.

Since my teeth are coming in, I hope you understand that you are in for many overtime hours, but I can promise you will be paid with extra slobbery kisses (I hope you don't mind if I eat my own feet first).

Lastly, I have decided that I should feed myself. Now, whether its pages I tear out from the phonebook and put in my mouth or whether its food you dropped on the floor last night, I'm happy to digest anything available. I'm not too persnickety, so feel free to prepare me food. I know you hate cooking, but a home cooked meal would be really appetizing, so please work on your culinary skills and be prepared to serve a 5 course menu by Friday.

Since you will be adding to your current duties, I'm offering you a promotion as well. Your paycheck will consist of more words, hugs, and milestones and more joy than you can possibly imagine.

Thanks for your time and have a pleasant day!